Sailor Mouth

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I’m trying to put an end to my salty language. I love cuss words. They taste great in my mouth, but I’m really trying. It’s hard, because there are a lot of dumb shits and assholes in this world.

Then my bestie with testes sends something like this: http://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/2m0z9q/hey_reddit_whats_the_best_swear_youve_ever_heard/

If you are a fan of Louis CK, you’ll realize the reason this kind of post defeats my purpose. Louis says, “Everybody – everybody has different words that offend them, different things that they hear that they get offended by – I’m – to me, the thing that offends me the most, is every time that I hear the “N” word. Not “nigger” by the way. I mean the “N” word, literally whenever a white lady on CNN with nice hair says: “The ‘N’ word.” That’s just white people getting away with saying nigger, that’s all that is. They found a way to say nigger. “N word.” It’s bullshit cause when you say the “N word” you put the word nigger in the listeners head.”

I don’t say the word, nor the assumptive phrase he uses, but the reddit post makes me cuss along with them. They are quite imaginative in their vocabulary, and frankly, I’m kind of  jealous.

Cussing, to me, is just one more thing to be addicted to. I don’t do drugs, I hardly drink, and I no longer smoke. After food and social media, cussing is all I have left.

 

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Day 30: One thing you’re excited for

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Ok. So, I have to let you in on a little secret. The only reason I was pushing to finish this challenge, was for this particular post.

One thing I am excited for is this weekend. If you are a music addict, or slightly in the know about music festivals, you will know that this weekend is the first ACL Fest weekend. I’ve been for the past couple of years, due to my philanthropic bestie with testes. The first year I went, he purchased the wristband as a survivor gift. Last year, I was able to go in a designated driver capacity. This year, I’ll be paying him back, but I’m most excited about it because…..I am taking my children! My son is 10, so this is the last year that he would be able to get in for free with an adult pass. He’s going to be so excited, and he’s been begging for me to take him to a concert. Any concert. He doesn’t care.

The great thing about this festival is the fact that they have a festival in the festival. Austin Kiddie Limits. It’s a kid’s tent that has activities and children’s performers. The School of Rock always performs, and though it’s not the kids from the movie, my children have seen the movie and are in awe of the fact that these people are their age. I can’t wait to show them in person, that they too can play an instrument, if they so choose. My son enjoys most of the music that I do, so I’m sure he’ll want to experience everything there is to experience. My daughter is a Top 40 chick, so the pickings may be slim for her. She’ll enjoy Kiddie Limits, because she likes Steve Songs from PBS Kids, and they will have crafts for her to do.

So, that’s going to be my weekend. Pretty exciting. I can’t wait to introduce my children to this amazing event, and post all of the fun pictures on Monday 🙂

Day 29: 5 weird things that you like

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1. My husband – trust me.

2. Potato salad sandwiches – I can’t remember exactly when this started, but I remember that I got it from my daddy. He was probably high with the munchies when he made this delicious dinner for me, but that’s ok. It’s stuck now. I don’t know if I actually still like eating it, or it just reminds me of him. Either way, you should try it.

3. Chick Fil A waffle fries with ketchup and mayonnaise – Have you had this nectar of the gods?!? Sweet, tangy, and salty! It’s the ultimate stoner/pms/kid who eats their feelings food!!

Geez! I can’t think of 5 things. If I like something, I automatically stop thinking of it as weird. I haven’t been told of anything strange that I like, but if I think of something else, I’ll have to write it down.

Day 28: Somewhere you’d like to move to or visit

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Well, this is a broad subject.  There are a lot of places I would like to visit, and not move to. On the other hand, there’s nowhere else I’d rather live than where I am right now.

1. Canada – I’d only like to visit in the Summer, because I don’t do snow well, and I hear that the summers are glorious!! I live in Texas, and summers here are hot, humid, and miserable.

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2. Seattle – Again, only in the summer, because cold and rain don’t mix well. Also, there’s a girl who lives there that I would love to meet! We “met” on Instagram and realized quickly that we were sisters of the soul. So many parallel life situations that it was kind of scary/spooky.

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3. Greece – The pictures that I have seen look amazing! I would want to go with my children, so that we could explore all of the history that the great country has to offer.

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4. Disneyworld – Once more, somewhere I’d like to take my children. This, at least, will happen before I die or they get too old (pssh! Who’s too old for DW?!?)

Disneyworld

Day 27: A quote you try to live by

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Yes, I know it’s October, and my writing challenge should be finished, but it isn’t. Suck it! Just kidding. You don’t have to suck anything you don’t want to.

This quote, I feel, is a bastardization of:

“Fear less, hope more; eat less, chew more; whine less, breathe more; talk less, say more; love more, and all good things will be yours.” ~ Swedish proverb

I hardly ever let worry or stress control my life, and it drives my husband cuh-razy! He is a constant worrier. Sometimes I feel like he enjoys it, or that it’s what drives him. That’s why I have a feeling he has an ulcer at the moment.  My best friend worries…a lot….about everything. It’s enough to drive a saint to drink.

I’m available to them for advice at a moments notice, even though I know that it will not be taken. I’m a human sounding board, and I will listen to all of their problems. I hardly ever never roll my eyes at what they deem life’s greatest problems at the moment. I love them both. In very different ways. I think that’s the main reason I am able to listen to them, because I love them more than I could ever hate their complaining/worrying.

Day 26: Things you like and dislike about yourself

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  1. I love my smile. My mother spent a fortune on it 😀
  2. I’m a loyal friend. If you’re part of my tiny circle, you’re there for life. Blood in/Blood out.
  3. I love that I’m creative in the kitchen. You’ll never go hungry when you stay at my house.
  4. I’m naive about ulterior motives. I can see when someone I care about is getting used, but completely blindsided when it happens to me.
  5. I’m forgiving. This is a love/hate thing for me. On one hand, it allows me to sleep better at night. On the other, I let people back into my life that are probably best left in the dust.

Day 25: Something you’re currently worrying about

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To be quite honest, I’m currently worried about my best friend. He is the sweetest guy, and he’s going through a buttload of crap at the moment.

Exes suck on g.p., but when you have intertwined DNA to form another human, I can only imagine it sucks way more.

Hang in there buddy. I’m here for you, always 🙂