Don’t harass my child….


Or I will fucking cut you!

My daughter is in her second year of girl scouts. Last year was an experience I would never want to repeat, and thankfully we were transferred to a different troop, so we won’t have to.

Here’s the thing….my daughter enjoys being part of the Girl Scouts. She has friends in her troop, and she likes doing the fun activities with them and her awesome troop leader. She knows nothing about the political agenda of the people who protest the organization due to their skewed sense of righteousness. She doesn’t know what Planned Parenthood is, because SHE’S 7!!!

So, here’s an idea. If you have something against a non-profit organization, take it up with headquarters, and not the innocent child trying to learn public speaking, money handling, and how to get along with other girls.

If you don’t want to buy cookies, then don’t. It doesn’t hurt the girls’ feelings, and they won’t follow you to your car, begging. A simple “no thank you” will suffice. We don’t have a quota, but if we did, there are plenty of people who have been asking for the crack cookies since October. Don’t be a pussy and try to hide. The children are observing you, and judging learning from your behavior. Don’t be rude in your response, or mama bear just might follow you to your car (kidding. Sort of.).

Here’s something to think about, though. When you feel the venom rising, and it’s about to push through your lips, remember that before every meeting, the girls recite the pledge of allegiance, the girl scout promise, and this:


So, when you are finding ways to put down a group of children, they are doing everything possible to build each other up.




How does one go from a loving embrace to wanting to throat punch someone within a few hours?

Be married to my husband.

He’s a good man, a hard worker, a great friend, BUT if he doesn’t drop the bass from his voice when speaking to me soon, he’s going to be no more.

We have been married for almost 13 years, and we’ve been a couple for 15. Ups and downs like any healthy relationship (with a few misdeeds on both of our parts). We have two beautiful, if not conscientious children.

We have different parenting styles. I prefer to nip the behavior(s) in the bud, while he has an “I’m laid back until you annoy me to the point of exploding” approach. Homework in our house is a Sisyphean effort. I tackle the reading, writing, social studies, and projects. He warily approaches fifth grade math. It may seem like an unfair division, but as I’ve said before….many, many times….I don’t math.

The problem with this is simple. The mister works all day, and gets home usually between 6 and 7 p.m. He works in a field where he’s surrounded by whiners all day, so to come home and be bombarded with questions about fractions, decimals, and why the hell any of this is important can be a tad overwhelming to him. This in no way gives him permission to come at me like a spider monkey when I suggest the Prince take his questions to his teacher tomorrow, seeing as how the mister can’t seem to answer a question without a condescending tone. I get it. The boy is a bit of an asshole. He puts off work until the last minute, then expects to be saved. He comes by it naturally. Both his father and I do the same. Damn. Thing.

This has been therapeutic. My pimp hand isn’t twitching half as bad. Now to go listen to some Drowning Pool…

Day 30: One thing you’re excited for


Ok. So, I have to let you in on a little secret. The only reason I was pushing to finish this challenge, was for this particular post.

One thing I am excited for is this weekend. If you are a music addict, or slightly in the know about music festivals, you will know that this weekend is the first ACL Fest weekend. I’ve been for the past couple of years, due to my philanthropic bestie with testes. The first year I went, he purchased the wristband as a survivor gift. Last year, I was able to go in a designated driver capacity. This year, I’ll be paying him back, but I’m most excited about it because…..I am taking my children! My son is 10, so this is the last year that he would be able to get in for free with an adult pass. He’s going to be so excited, and he’s been begging for me to take him to a concert. Any concert. He doesn’t care.

The great thing about this festival is the fact that they have a festival in the festival. Austin Kiddie Limits. It’s a kid’s tent that has activities and children’s performers. The School of Rock always performs, and though it’s not the kids from the movie, my children have seen the movie and are in awe of the fact that these people are their age. I can’t wait to show them in person, that they too can play an instrument, if they so choose. My son enjoys most of the music that I do, so I’m sure he’ll want to experience everything there is to experience. My daughter is a Top 40 chick, so the pickings may be slim for her. She’ll enjoy Kiddie Limits, because she likes Steve Songs from PBS Kids, and they will have crafts for her to do.

So, that’s going to be my weekend. Pretty exciting. I can’t wait to introduce my children to this amazing event, and post all of the fun pictures on Monday 🙂



I prefer to do my writing on a regular computer, and since we don’t have internet, I have to wait for an opportunity to go to my mother’s house.  This is the reason for my post-a-paloooza today.

Now, I’m all caught up, and I’ll try not to do this again, but I can make no promises.  I’ve never finished a monthly challenge, even when I was on Instagram.  I would get to the halfway point, and give up….and that’s just pictures!!  I have lots of ideas, but I never seem to write them down.  Funny thing for a “writer” to admit, but there you go.  I also have A.D.D., so that is another obstacle. I’ll think of something that I think is interesting to write about, and then….squirrel!  Don’t even get me started on shiny objects. No, really. Don’t, because I’ll never get back on track.

Let’s see what I’ve been thinking about recently.

Feminism. It’s been on my mind, because I read a lot of what I’m supposed to do/not do as a feminist. I love my womanhood.  I love that I am able to create life. Men, I swear, you can say that it takes your sperm to help create life, but that’s all it does. It contributes to the gene pool.  When you can actually carry a child, you can say that you helped more than you actually did. On the flip side, that means that you have absolutely no say in whether a woman has to carry a baby to term. I know that abortion is a hot topic issue, but unless you can gestate, you shouldn’t dictate.

Also, I may be a feminist, but I am also feminine. I adore when my husband opens the door for me.  I love hearing that I am pretty.  Just because I enjoy these things, doesn’t make me any less of a feminist.  I don’t NEED for these things to be done to feel complete.  I do need to know that when I go to a mechanic, I will be treated like a person, not a gender. I do need to know that if I am qualified for a job, I will get it, regardless of my vagina.  I do need to know that when my daughter grows up, I will have instilled the self confidence in her to deal with the rampant misogyny. Ladies, it is commendable what you do, but no amount of fighting will get rid of all of it. Especially, if you behave like you hate men.  When you do that, you are not opening up discussion, you are putting someone on the defensive.  The only conclusion that will bring is a negative one.  We want equality, yet when men treat us the same way they treat each other, we cry abuse.  We can’t have our cake and eat it, too.

Abuse.Cheese and rice! What is going on?!?  Between Ray Rice and his wife, Adrian Peterson and his children, and Kanye West and the handicapped I don’t know how to react! These people are all in the spotlight, yet they can’t seem to get themselves under control.

Relationships. We struggle. Daily. Marriage is hard, and I know that it seems like a platitude, but it’s true. I guess I should have known, since my mother and grandmother didn’t have the best track records. I think had I known about myself then what I know now, I would have spared both of us a lot of pain.

Parenting. I have issues with this all the damn time!! I would never in a million years win an award for my parenting skills. To be quite honest, we’re pretty lucky we’ve survived each other this long. My son has behavioral issues. He can’t seem to control his impulses, and I can’t seem to find a solution. I sometimes feel at my wits end, and nobody else has any suggestions either. My daughter is decent. She behaves, but she is an attention addict like me. I see nothing but problems in our future. At least we didn’t name her Diamond.

Those have been my random thoughts lately. I guess they connect more than I initially thought. Go figure.

Day 16: Something you always think “What if…” about


This is hard for me, because I love my life.  My children are my world, and I can’t imagine being married to anyone but my husband.  I guess if I had a “what if” moment, it would be about going to college.  I was accepted into Southwest Texas State University(now Texas State University) when I graduated in 1995.  I didn’t get any scholarships, and only received one loan offer for $1200.  Needless to say, this would not have been enough to even pay for my books.  I wanted to be an interior designer, but looking back, that may have just been because I picked a random degree. Now, at age 37, I have no idea what I would want to do with my life.  I have only ever held customer service positions, and lord knows those are thankless jobs.  Every year I am a stay at home mom, it cements the mentality that I have no marketable skills.

I tried to start my own business with the crafts that I make, but that fizzled out when I figured out that I had to sell myself.  I am not a salesperson. At all. I don’t know how to network, and I’m lost when it comes to technology.  I tried to get the mbff to help, but sadly, he has a life and can’t hold my hand through it all.  Also, I enjoy making things, but it is harder to do when it is a job.  I like to give the stuff away, and for some reason, you can’t make money that way.

So….what if…..I went to college. Would I have met my husband? Probably not. If I had not met him, I wouldn’t have my two precious angels, and that is a life not worth living.


you first

Day 9: How important is education


I didn’t go to college. My mbff didn’t go to college. My fbff DID go to college, and received a bachelor’s degree in education.

I am a stay at home mom, living comfortably in a four bedroom/two bath home. Mbff is living quite well in his spacious home, working for a popular technological company. Fbff is also a stay at home mom, after working as an adjunct professor for several years.

I think what I am trying to say is, education is important. To a certain extent. You don’t need more than a high school education to find a profession and live comfortably, AND having a degree doesn’t necessarily mean that you will be happy in the career path that your degree is for.

More than a college education, I think we should be giving our children a “real life” education. We, as a society, need to be educated about race, gender, mental, and lifestyle differences. I am sick of the ignorance that is running rampant around me. We need to teach our children how to keep track of a checking account. We need to teach our children how to fight, both verbally and physically (because there are some real assholes out there). We need to teach our children how to change a tire, change the oil, and other basic vehicle maintenance.

Education is important, but the right kind of education. The type of knowledge that will make our children grow to be positive and productive members of our society.